Down Goes Another One
by lostmidtranslation
Summary: Fred's Dead, And George can't cope. What's going to happen to him? KBGW In there, some sadness.


_**DISCLAIMER: Lyrics are the wonderful "Down Goes another one" By Mcfly, so they belong to them, and Anything you recognise were invented by JK Rowling. No infringement intended.**_

_**Hope you enjoy. **_

_**I wrote this for a friend's christmas present, so please, Read and Review ASAP... I want it to be perfect for her.**_

_---_

_Did the best / That I could  
Said I'd die for you / & I would  
But I've drowned / all these feelings in the flood _

_**You're my brother. How can I be here, and you… not? It'd be stupid to say I miss you - there is so much more than that that left with you… I woke up this morning, wondering where my other half had gone, why I felt so lost. **_

_**I sat up, waited for those few seconds and looked over at your bed. We always shared everything, twin rooms when we were lucky enough to go on holiday, shoes… everything. I guess we shared part of a soul as well; something in me died yesterday, Fred. Something is missing and I don't know where it's gone. "George! George, breakfast…" Mum bursts through the door and catches me staring at the pictures on the wall. "Come on, sweetheart…" she sighs, pulling me into a hug, "he's in a better place." **_

_**But are you, Fred? Will you let me know?**_

_  
Need to Know / If you're there  
If you're listening to my Prayers,  
Do my tears / Feel like raindrops / Through the mud?_

_**I stand, staring at the sky through your funeral. It's not right for us to be here, and you to be there. I can't look at you, down in the… grave. It makes me want to be sick, want to throw punches and hurt everyone so much they feel as bad as me. **_

_**Nobody's in black apart from Angelina, we thought you'd like to know we remember you as full of colour, so, when I look around, I see Ron dressed in Chudley Cannon's Quidditch strip, the bright orange robes almost painful to look at, Oliver Wood in jeans and a Puddlemere top, the family in varying shades of blue and green, Angelina in a black dress and white heels. **_

_**I walk away, afraid they will see me cry. Why do you do this to me mate? Why did you leave me a wreck? A shell? Nothing.**_

_**I look down at my hand as I feel a soft hand curl into mine. Bright yellow nails contrast against the bright pink tutu, black tights, silver shoes and fluorescent green top she's wearing. I feel a little less overdressed in my red jeans and blue shirt. Katie smiles at me, and I feel a little better. **_

"_**It's alright, George." She whispers as she looks down at the grass, scuffing it with her high heels. "You know we're going to let him go with a bang." I half nod. Was there ever any doubt? "You can cry, George." She says as she gently pulls me towards the group, "Because I will too." **_

_**Minutes later, our tears are falling into the mud beside your grave, and I start to wonder if you can hear me, see us standing there.**_

How was I to know  
that a year ago  
I'd need to read between the lines  
& Every lie  
That's why... 

_**Mum is going to murder us. Lee Jordan, Katie Bell, Oliver Wood and me. We sat together in the corner, drinking glass after glass of fire whiskey, until it was late. Then, as soon as we were drunk enough not to care, we sat setting off some spare fireworks for hours on end, watching them fly up, up further and further until they went Boom! And we could laugh, and say 'I bet you he saw that one', and 'ooh, heaven got rocked there.'**_

_**The garden is filled with all the sticks from the rockets, Katie and Lee are playing magi-Frisbee with a Catherine wheel, Oliver still enchanting his hair back to its original colour. **_

"_**George…" Mum shouts out, ducking her head from the kitchen door, "Come on, IN. It's past midnight."**_

_**Katie extinguishes the Catherine wheel with a wave of her wand, Oliver finally settles on a shade of brown not too dissimilar to the colour it usually is, and Lee apparates home. The three of us who remain stagger inside, giggling drunkenly, but as I pass the threshold into the Burrow, I look up to the stars and guess which one is you. **_

_**I picked the third from the left, just before the moon. **_

_**Goodnight, mate. **_

_  
Everytime I fall asleep my dreams are haunted  
& Everytime I close my eyes I'm not alone  
And everytime I cry I'm right back where you wanted  
I try to drown you out so,  
Down goes another one  
(Down Goes Another one)  
Down goes another one  
_

_**I sat, alone in the kitchen that night, watching the clock with all our names on it. Yours, hovering on Lost, mine sitting beside it. I assume you're lost to us all, but I'm lost without you. I move to the cupboard, open it and find the bottle of fire whiskey we bought for Bill and Fleur's wedding. **_

_**Throwing myself down at the table, I unscrew the lid and pour myself a glassful. The liquid burns my throat, but it makes me feel better, so much better. It warms my stomach and I sigh as I pour myself a second glass. **_

_**I don't think I stop until a small voice halts me.**_

"_**Georgie…" I look up, it's Katie, a pair of my pyjamas drawn around her, "Does your mum have anything to get rid of a headache?" **_

"_**A heazhachhhhe?" I slur, rising to go to the cupboard and staggering, falling to the floor. Her hands unsuccessfully try to pick me up, she ends up calling on Oliver, and he appears, blurred and loud, even though he's whispering. **_

"_**Is he alright?" He stumbles over the words, never was a drinker, was Oliver, tipsy on a glass of champagne.**_

"_**I think he's a bit… drunk…" Katie whispers back, "help me get him to bed, alright?" And I remember her grabbing one arm and him the other. She climbed in next to me, I assume they'd put me in the bed she was sleeping in, just to look after me… to keep her awake. **_

_**Bloody hell, Fred. **_

_  
Living Fast /Dying young  
But I'm living with what you've done  
Now I face accusations / I won't run  
(No) _

_**The first anniversary of your death I spend having my stomach pumped in hospital. I've been drinking a bottle of Firewhiskey a night for the past three months, since I decided that if you couldn't be with me, I could easily get to you. **_

_**Katie found me throwing up on the floor, looked at me with pain in her eyes.**_

"_**George… why do you keep-"**_

"_**What? Katie? What?" I look up at her, my face pale and sweating, gaze wide, unfocused, scared. Terror flashes in her eyes this time; she closes them slowly, blinks twice and looks away.**_

"_**I can't keep trying, George… there's only so much I can do!" She is shrieking in emotional turmoil, determined not to… I think she's trying not to cry.**_

"_**Katie," Staggering as I regain my feet, going to put my arms around her, I breathe her name, collapse to the floor, black out.**_

"_**George!" She is screaming my name now, begging me to wake up. **_

_**Let me be near you, brother, let me be with you. Let me come back to you, brother, because that's the only place I know.  
**  
I'm starting to remember things that you said,  
I'm unravelling what they meant  
But the world moves on / You're just another one ._

_**I remember you saying she was beautiful, just my type, that I should ask her out when she got out of St. Mungo's. I didn't know then that she'd be the one I'd fall for, eventually. **_

_**She sits and watches me as I pour myself a shot of fire whiskey. A second, a third, more follow until I'm barely able to keep her in focus. **_

"_**You have to stop," She murmurs, taking my hand and looking at me like she did the day I cried for you. **_

_**It's pity, Fred, she bloody pities me. All because of you. Tell me what to do, brother.**_

"_**Tell me what to do!" I roar. She jumps back, stares at me, scared. **_

"_**George - I…" but I start to sob before she can speak. **_

"_**I can't do it, Katie…" I breathe, as she wraps her arms around me. "Not anymore." I bury myself into her top, holding on, broken. **_

"_**Come on, George…" She whispers into my ear, "I'll help you. I'll help you make it better." Her lips rest against my cheek and I know it will be a long time before I'm OK again. But here goes nothing.**_

And how can I go on?  
Coz when I'm in the sun, I see your shadow on the ground...  
But you're never there,  
When I turn around  


_**I jolt as I look in the mirror, seeing you, standing there, grinning at me. I smile back, blink and you're gone. **_

"_**No! Fred-" I shout it aloud, throwing my hands at the mirror. It connects with a sickly crunch and shatters over my skin. Scratches and cuts appear on my skin, ones down my forearm bleeding profusely. **_

_**You were there. I had to get to you. You never stay - you're just there long enough to play with my head, to fuck with my emotions. Why do you keep doing this, brother? I thought you were the other half of me? **_

_**Katie finds me, sitting in the bathroom, washing the blood away. **_

"_**Hey…" She whispers, her voice as soft as her skin as she takes my left hand gently and waves her wand over it, the blood receding, the skin healing as she does so. "Hey, you broke my mirror." She smiles and winks at me. I return the hollow gesture. **_

"_**Katie… I'm sorry." I whisper, looking up to the heavens, up at where you're watching me, I know it. You're standing there, smiling at me, aren't you, Fred? You're watching me and telling me it was a stupid thing to do. But probably the right thing, because she leans forward and kisses my forehead, gently making me feel less… alone.**_

_**We were always lucky like that, weren't we? We did stupid things, but they turned out alright in the end.**_

_**Where did that do wrong? **_

_  
[Chorus]_

_**She watches me, warily, scared of the next movement I'm going to make, the next thing I'm going to say, the next person I'm going to hurt. **_

"_**George…" She whispers as she sits down on my bed, the marks of my last attempt to get to you, brother, to be with you, those marks rest on her face, the pain in her eyes, the fear in her embrace. **_

"_**It's alright." I whisper, then, "Next time," With pride.**_

"_**It's got to stop." she says, nearly screaming, "Please. You don't understand what you're doing."**_

"_**I think I understand better than you," I roar back, almost throwing myself from my hospital bed. I've been reduced to this, Fred. This… place. These people… they don't understand.**_

"_**You think you're doing this all on your own, don't you? You think that because he was your twin, you feel all the pain in the world, and it means nothing to us."**_

_**She'd taken my hands midway through her words, looked at the muggle bandages wrapped around my wrists. She throws them aside as she decides she's done with me. **_

"_**Katie, Katie wait-"**_

"_**George…" Her voice is low, scared. She turns on her heel and runs towards me, wrapping her arms around me, tight.**_

_And how can I go on?  
Coz when I'm in the sun  
I see your shadow on the ground...  
(Shadow on the ground)  
But you're never there,  
When I turn around.  
_

_**I rub my shoulder as I watch her, she forces him to feel all those things he'd never allow himself to feel if she wasn't there. **_

_**I'm happy it's her. he makes her feel superhuman, well, super-witch-like. and she makes him feel the same way. She runs her hand across his, smiles at him as he leans in to kiss her. **_

"_**It's that day again, isn't it?" She whispers as she gently pushes him away. And it is. The anniversary of the day we were parted, fifteen years on. **_

_**He still talks to me every day, still makes it known that I'm around, that he's not going to forget me. In fact… the only time he doesn't think of me… is when she's there.**_

"_**I miss him, Katie," He murmurs to her as she lays against him in the night. **_

"_**I know you do." I murmur back, momentarily appearing in his field of vision, scaring him, frightening him, reassuring him. **_

"_**Bye Fred." He murmurs, reaches up and tries to catch my spectral form. Of course, he can't, but I still smile, and wave goodbye to him. **_

_Everytime I fall asleep my dreams are haunted _

_(My dreams are haunted)  
& Everytime I close my eyes I'm not alone _

_(I'm not alone)  
And everytime I cry I'm right back where you wanted _

_(Right back where you wanted)  
I try to drown you out so,  
Down goes another one  
Hey!_

_  
[Down Goes Another One… to fade]_

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_**A/N Please R&R and let me know your thoughts **_

_**xxx**_


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